December 2005
dear worshipful fans & comrades,
What a long, strange trip it's been--since Tuesday, I mean. That's when National Public Radio (NPR) aired "Mama & the Chain Gang" and infected 16 million listeners with the CQ virus. Since it was aired, I've been thrilled to get emails from folks around the country.
Those familiar with the story will notice that it changed a lot from the version on this site. I'd love to know what you think of the new version. Click here to listen, or go to npr.org and type my name in the search engine.
NPR has accepted another story, and I'm deep in rewrite mode at the moment. I'll let you know when it is broadcast.
Until then, don't forget that Cracker Queens always get the last cackle.
Late-September 2005
dear worshipful fans & comrades,
A poem is on my mind as I sit and
write these words:
Barn’s burnt down—now I can see the moon.-Masahide
I suspect that
a lot of folks’ barns are burning…
New story alert: Next
week I will be at Georgia Public Radio recording three new stories. If you’re on the CQ mailing list, I’ll
send you the audio links once the tales are broadcast. Shoot me an email if
you’d like to be on the list. I’ll tell you more about the stories
in my next epistle.
Animated audience at the library in Springfield, GA (April 15, 2005)
The Cracker Queen makes the front-page news—and this time it’s
not for violating her probation! |
My readings earlier this year were grand. Thank you
to everyone who attended the shows in Springfield and Hinesville, GA.
Thanks to Robin Shader and Melissa White for inviting me to their libraries.
A special appreciation goes to Kathy Bohannon for her review of the
Springfield gig.
I must tell you about a woman I met in Springfield.
Her name is Annselma LaFavor, and she’s a strong contender for
the CQ Hall of Fame. I mean, come on, her name is Annselma AND she’s
on Husband Number Eight. She also has some tales to tell. Here
are two of my favorites.
Until next time, don’t worry if your barn is aflame. It will
surely be replaced with something you can’t even imagine right
now. After all, this is the promise that keeps a good ol’ Cracker
Queen going.
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Spring 2005 CQ Gigs: April 15 @ the Springfield Library & April
16 at the Hinesville Library. Both readings will begin at 7pm.
“You might be a Cracker Queen if…” Contest Email
your best “You might be a CQ if” joke, and I’ll send
you an appropriately trashy Cracker Queen prize. Every entrant will
receive a gift.
See lots of new photos on the Picture Show page. |
March 2005
dear worshipful fans & comrades,
“We are all lying in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the
stars,” said Oscar Wilde. I’ve been stargazing a lot in the last
year. Some of the highlights:
I wrote a photo history book of Powder Springs, GA in less than seven
weeks
Attended the Yeats Winter School in Sligo, Ireland
After a liter of mulled wine and a few incantations, I nearly fainted at
the grave of the master: William Butler Yeats.
Fled from haints at a haunted B&B in Cave Spring, GA
Bought cologne in Cologne, Germany from a gruesomely-tanned woman
with body odor worse than my Uncle Buddy when he had that skin condition
Produced a CD of my stories
Had a 12’x12’ writing shack built in the backyard
I’m in the shack now as a heavy rain falls and the fire in the woodstove
blazes. There is no electricity in this space—the Cracker Queen’s
playhouse. My place to write, read, play flute, and just be. I realized six
months ago that I needed a remote room of my own. Virginia Woolf knew what
the hell she was talking about. (Note to those of you who pay attention to
such things: I left the 12’x20’ shack mentioned elsewhere on this
site when we moved to a new house.)
The William Butler Yeats study was an ecstatic few days. We drank liters
of mulled wine and listened to his magnificent words. The deeper one goes
into Yeats, the greater the delights. He offers everything: love, death, sex,
magic and alchemy, politics, philosophy, spirituality, theatre, prophecy.
Earlier this year astronomers reported of a dying star whose light outshone
the Milky Way’s other half-trillion stars combined. That is Yeats’ place
in the galaxy of poets.
During the Yeats study in Ireland,
I hooked up with some hilarious women from northern Ireland. Cathleen, at
left, and Margaret, at right, helped promote the Cracker Queen by posing with
CQ postcards.
After the study I took the train to my great-grandfather’s
birthplace near Ballymote. As a young man, he was stuffed in a barrel by the
little people and rolled down a hill. I was on a quest to see the hill and
the mythic caves of Keash. Tales abound of those of entered the dank, mysterious
caves and were never heard from again. Wolves sought shelter there 12,000
years ago. What a thrill to see these things that have been in my mind since
I was knee-high to a leprechaun.
During my few hours in Dublin, my main goal was to view the Book of Kells.
As it turned out, I lingered in the tourist shops and arrived at Trinity College
too late to see them. But I did buy cheap tea towels imprinted with designs
from the book. Typical American.
I’m writing all kinds of things—more stories for Georgia Public
Radio, perhaps a screenplay, and some scraps on living joyfully in a miserable
world (stargazing again from the gutter).
In Cologne, Germany,
in front of the famous cathedral: those creepy rays of sunshine remind me
of the Jesus picture Granny kept in her living room.
Last year’s gigs at the Clarksville Library and at Savannah’s
Flannery O’Connor Home were great fun. Get your taxes done and come
see me on April 15 at the Springfield Library and on April 16 at the Hinesville
Library.
In the meantime, send me your stories and be one hellraisin’ cracker.
February 19, 2004
dear worshipful fans & comrades,
The Cracker Queen is hittin' the road again. Here's the scoop on upcoming
readings.
March 25, 2004
Clarkesville Public Library
7 pm
Clarkesville, GA
Sponsored by the Habersham County Libraries
Clarkesville is in the North Georgia mountains, so use the reading as an
excuse for a road trip or a long weekend in that beautiful part of cracker
land.
May 23, 2004
Flannery O'Connor Childhood Home
3 pm
Savannah, GA
Part of the Flannery O'Connor Spring Lecture Series
Savannah is the most fabulously decadent kingdom in Georgia. Join me as
we raise all manner of hell in Flannery's house.
November 16, 2003
dear worshipful fans & comrades,
It took a broken big toe to slow me down enough to write this long overdue epistle.
Yes, several weeks ago the CQ was bouncing barefoot on a game called the Velcro
Wall. The goal of it is to bounce high and hurl oneself onto a sticky wall. Instead
it turned into a game of Rush Lola to the ER.
I've had three stories air on Georgia Public Radio since last we met. The
first, “You Put a Root on Me,” describes a series of near-death calamities I
endured after writing an article criticizing a Savannah politician. Was this
voodoo or just Irish Cracker Bad Luck? Decide for yourself at
www.gpb.org/gpr/gazette/shows/index.asp?episid=1004 This
story aired on May 16 on the Georgia Gazette program and appears about thirty-five
minutes into the hour-long show.
I still can't believe the response I've received from the second story, “Blood Knowledge.” It
deals with a mysterious glimmer of understanding I gained while grieving for
my father. The Marietta Daily Journal (Marietta, Georgia) ran a printed version
of the story in its Father's Day edition.
When I send words out into the ether I wonder if anyone is listening. And so
I was thrilled to get many emails from folks who were touched by this story.
Let me know what you think. You can hear it at
www.gpb.org/gpr/gazette/shows/index.asp?episid=1029 This
one aired on June 13 and appears at the fourteen-minute point in the program.
The third story is entirely different. It is a straightforward profile of a
quartet of blue-haired, country mountain musicians known as The Myers
Sisters. These CQ grannies rock! Enjoy them at
www.gpb.org/gpr/gazette/?episid=1038 The
story appears near the end of the
program, at the forty-second minute point, and was broadcast on June 27.
It was a hoot to interview and record the country mountain music of The
Myers Sisters.
The CQ meets up with one of her role models: Comedian Brett Butler.
More stories are in the oven, so stay tuned. In the meantime, I leave you
whup-ass women (and the men who adore them) with these words from Isadora
Duncan, “You were once wild here. Don't let them tame you.”
PS-Thanks to everyone who continues to submit stories to this site. Click
here to read a fabulous story about the Weed Lady of Alexandria.
january 16, 2003
dear worshipful fans & comrades,
Good Lord—things at CQ-HQ have been a mess these last months, but as Gilda Radner says, "I can always be distracted by love, but eventually I get horny for my creativity." Here's the latest from the always hoppin' world of the CQ.
The gleaming turquoise and chrome dashboard of the Cracker Queenmobile: a '62 Mercury Comet that will be the official CQ Summer Tour vehicle.
- Preparations are underway for a Cracker Queen Summer Tour in June. I will load up the '62 Mercury Comet and spend a week on the dirt roads and trailer park trails of Georgia, reading my stories to anyone, and I do mean ANYONE, who will listen. Tentative stops include a public library in the mountains, a bookshop in Savannah, a mental institution and a women's prison in middle Georgia (I know what you're thinkin'), a college in Macon, and impromptu sites along the way. Check back here for my tour journal and photos.
- I'm working on some new tales and have started a longer piece (I'm too scared to say the N-word: novel) about my cracker relatives. Let's just say that these folks make Tobacco Road seem like a story of high-achieving, prosperous Southerners. One working title is "Marriage, Sadism, & Breakdown."
- Several folks have asked me to list my favorite authors and poets, so here are some of 'em: William Butler Yeats (he stares at me from a framed photo by the desk), William Blake, Seamus Heaney, Pablo Neruda, Yunus Emre (a thirteenth-century Sufi poet),William Faulkner, and Dylan Thomas.
- Whatever you do, keep sending me your stories. Four of my favorites are posted here. I will add more throughout the year.
- A final admonition: never forget that ours is a vital and vibrant mission. The cosmos smiles when strong, authentic, whup-ass women have a voice. We are in this together.
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For more information about this performance, please email me or visit 
